Chewing and Fixing Jack Frost's Bubblegum Heart
by SeaTheShadows
Summary: Jack muses on the irony of his plight with bubblegum.


Chewing and Fixing Jack Frost's Bubblegum Heart

Jack likes bubble gum. Strolling past candy shops in NYC, he sees the bright colors. Any kind and any color.

Pink, green, bright white. The sticky substance fills his mouth. He likes how it tastes as well. The flavors are so realistic, seemingly extracted from the real food and compressed into a tiny cube or stick. Mint, tangerine, ice cream sandwich.

Tooth always asked why his teeth were so white. He uses the ADA approved bubble gum. He likes to blow bubbles at invisible people in the spring and summer (he always liked the Americas better than the Old World, that was Old Man Winter's Domain. Asia's ruled by the Ice Princess.).

There is a darker side to the bubble gum as well. It's not just for dental hygiene and blowing bubbles (and accidentally making sure it sticks into Bunny's fur).

No. It reminds him of when he was alone.

He was around 20 years old in his immortal life when he began to beat himself.

In the 1900's (or was is the 1800's? Things like these got messed up in his head.), bubblegum was invented. He loved how the kids smiled and did tricks with the plastic substance.

Eventually he found another more sadistic use for it.

He discovered what a wonderful gag it was.

His screams used to puncture the night air every month on the New Moon. Even though he eventually became addicted to the pain, he could never do it if the moon was out. He couldn't have anyone watching, even if it was an asshole.

He remembers when he had his fists balled, hitting random targets on his body. Each time a bruise appeared his supernatural body would heal it.

After he found bubblegum, he used it during his monthly beatings. Instead of biting on his tongue, each time his fits lashed out he was also greeted with a burst of sweetness. Blood was salty, but this added a whole new dimension to his pain.

It was ironic, really, the whole thing was. How the pain brought him release, made him feel human and alive, but also so alone and foreign. If humans ever saw him, they would be ashamed of what he did.

The Guardians would be ashamed of him.

He couldn't tell them, it would break their hearts.

The bubblegum had one other important purpose in its short but tasty life.

It reminded him he wasn't a doll. With his porcelain colored skin, white hair, and startling blue eyes he could pass as one. Dolls couldn't eat. It helped him remember he was a human, or at least a mutation of one.

Jack made a mental list of the purposes of gum as how he used to use it.

_Gag_

_Something to do_

_Playing pranks_

_Something to eat (if there was nothing else)._

Next, he made a list of what he uses it for now.

_Pranks (that didn't change)._

_Dental Hygiene_

_An excuse for not talking recently._

_To help with thinking._

Jack begins to examine his legs, where he used to beat himself. No scars litter his body, no black and blues, nothing.

It was if the Moon was mocking him. All of the time he spent alone was pointless.

The Guardians don't know, but he thinks they suspect that he did something to deal with being alone.

If only they knew. He roamed over to Times Square.

Watching high school groups of kids take pictures in the iconic space. It looked slightly more crowded than usual. Then he remembered today was New Year's. There was the usual line of luxury buses lined up, except the crowds seemed to be hogging the entire part of Times Square.

New Years. He should probably be going now. He felt slightly claustrphobic.

**_New Years: A time for new beginnings, almost like Easter._**

He looked up to the moon. A shooting star fell in front of it, almost making it appear that the moon winked.

_Damn moon._

However, like a child and his parents, Jack knew the moon had a ring of truth to its words.

After all, if the moon tells you something, you better believe it.

**_J_**_ack Frost is the lonely kid._

_Every hier__**a**__rchy has._

_Immortal teen._

_Beating of fists, slicing of wrists._

_Blood peeking out, wanting to be seen._

_Its playfulness demonic. _

_Eyes wide like a __**c**__at._

**_K_**_icking screaming games to play._

_Games:_

_Only __**f**__un when __**r**__isks are inv__**o**__lved._

_Abuse,_

_i__**s**__ common and is sad._

_Self-abuse is worse._

**_T_**_hrown a bone by a moon,_

_Told to be a puppet._

_Told not to cry_

_(He is a "man" after all),_

_To be good and be real._

_We never want what we have…_

_Until we lose it._

**_Jackson Overland_**_ knows this especially._

_We both understand._

Jack smiles. He went up to watch the pendulum drop, cheers drowned out by his meditation.

_Falling, falling, falling._

_Three… The announcer's voice blares._

_Two… A woman starts to faint in the audience._

_One._

_Cheers cascade, reverberating around the people with an echo._

_A white haired teen makes a wish._

Jackson Overland walks out, with a wish to go see Jaime.

Tomorrow, he will see the Guardians. Maybe he can tell them. Maybe not.

Today, he will be human again.

Perhaps take Jaime ice skating. He never got to to do that with his sister.

Maybe he can come full circle.

**Whew. Had to get that off my chest. Not my usual writing style. Usually write adventure stuff. Beginning, in my opinion, is a bit morbid, middle a bit weird and rushed, ending fine. Oh, and by the way, does ROTG have any awards (like the Veritas)? Just curious. PM me if you know. Thank you for reading. I felt like the ending wasn't strong enough, so I edited it slightly.**

**-SeaTheShadows**

**Dedicated to victims/survivors of suicide, and self-harm.**


End file.
